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Home Alone

Last night was the first night I've been at home in a while. I found myself doing a speed round on TiVo and then settling in on regularly scheduled programming. Snooze.

It's hard to tell which show -- Biggest Loser or Dancing with the Stars -- takes the longest to reveal who's been eliminated. And it occurred to me that both of those shows are pretty much the same and a waste of time. Then I caught a few minutes of The Judds. Mama Judd was having a breakdown, and that's when it hit me -- she looks just like Michael Jackson. That's when I turned off the TV.

Take a Hike

In the Clear