At 4:15 yesterday, I had an appointment with my dentist for a cleaning. Over the last 10 years, this has taken 20 minutes. Not yesterday.
Mary, the receptionist and x-ray tech, took me right back. She pointed out that I hadn't had "a full mouth series" of x-rays since 2009. "Should we do some today?"
"Sure. Whatever you recommend."
Mary went to work. I lost count of how many little films she inserted into my mouth, but between each one, we discussed her work history. She worked in the restaurants along 34th Street for 15 years. Before that, she was a mechanic. I missed the part about where she learned to shoot little pulses of radiation into my body. She seemed to know what she was doing.
Then, Dr. L came in. "Do you want to remodel your kitchen?"
"Huh? Oh, no, I rent."
She reclined the chair and pressed on about this "green" demolition company and how you can buy other people's kitchens and put them in your own home. I asked if she was remodeling. She said no. Since she only works three days a week, she goes from one site to another buying all of these discounted appliances. Once, she bought a mantle from The Plaza. Another time, she thought about buying 30 toilets. She interrupted herself to recommend we do some x-rays.
"Mary's on it!"
Twenty minutes passed and included a slideshow of the kitchen she bought for her friend. She eventually got to cleaning my teeth. I fully expected her to conclude by saying that I don't floss enough. Nope.
"Now what are the names of the companies I mentioned?"
"Dr. L, I have no idea."
I got my free toothbrush and exited the building.
I guess my teeth are healthy. I don't know. The dentist and I didn't discuss. Maybe I should call Mary, the mechanic.
People are crazy.